Become a writer, they said. It would be fun, they said. They didn't mention that writing turns you into a complete monster. Enjoy those waves of creativity before bed? How about at 1 AM when you have a sudden brain implosion and you simply can't sleep until you open up this floodgate of words? So then I decide to cave in and get my iPod. After recovering from temporary blindness, I make a note to change my brightness settings and open up notes. Then it's time to stare blankly at the screen for the next fifteen minutes. And this is where the monster part comes in.
Ever written an outline for a research paper? Or attempted to classify animals or plants? If you try to understand my brain, a scientist would do it this way. It starts with 1) A Generic Thing. This could be anything I choose to write about, like maybe writing. (yes, I write about writing.) But before moving on to number two, you realize that A Generic Thing has a few things to be mentioned. So then you have, A) A Generic Thing's First Complication. B) A Generic Thing's Second Complication, and C) A Generic Thing's Third Complication. Then suddenly realize when you're all the way down the list at Z) A Generic Thing's Twenty-Sixth Complication, you look back and realize that Q) A Generic Thing's Seventeenth Complication has some extra little buddies that need to be discussed. Then you have things like A.1) A Generic Thing's Seventeenth Complication's Extra Complication Number One, until you run out of letters and numbers you can actually spell. Finally, if you're lucky, you may have a neat little equation that belongs in the back of a trigonometry book.
Now that you have it in perspective, try to understand that I like to write free-verse poems about complicated topics that I soon realize can't be described in words. And I have a fear of forgetting things (even though I never do) so when I want to write, I do it. NOW. Even if it's 3 AM. So take all of this and multiply it times forty-seven, then add school, sleep, social life, any life at all, and writer's block.
If you weren't fully convinced I'm insane, now you know.
